KRITZ.NET

the burger video game i did not make

whats good pals,
i think i have creatively abandoned this project
for long enough to write my farewellz


question: "where is the video game"
answer: i dont know my friend, it is on my hard drive
somewhere!

the video game where you made ham bugers with your friends
was a project i made while i was in university.
it was very poorly made, as most of you would know.
within a few weeks a few million people played it
which was not something i had expected to happen.


within like a month i had stopped working on the video game
because video games are hard and i wasnt very good
but i did keep trying for a while.

a few weeks later i got hired to make a video game
for a university.
i got paid money to do this and it was a lot easier
to be alive with money than it was from not having money.

so i kept doing that for a while


two years later i finished that job and then got another offer
for another company in melbourne
(the city with all the coffee nerds)

i did think in my dumb *ass brain that i could work this other
job and still make the "video
game".

i was wrong!



and then i got hired to work on another game and another game
you can actually buy one of the games i worked on
its called party crashers
i worked on the camera
and some power ups and stuff


but every other game i have worked on has been
for private companies


one day i would like to make more games for the public
because i really like making people happy

but i really dont like making people not happy,
which hoo boy "thats what i did"


sorry for not making the video game
i read all the emails you send me

at the e mail address " onlygoodemailsplease
at kritz d*t net ".
please do not send bad emails !!

some of the emails i receive are very sad and others
are very heart warming
and i want to thank all of you for
keeping in touch

or yelling at me

or telling me i am a
*ss h*ole
!

but most of y'all were very nice. also most of you are children.
i am a thirty or forty year old
man and it's weird having so many
children email me
so please be safe online.

also for one minute if i can put it out there:
most video game youtube personalities are bad people.
pew die pie is a bad person.
his videos "s*ck shit" and i hate them.

sorry for swearing, this is my web-site though so really
'thats what you get'.

by the way if anyone is in the melbourne game dev scene pleas efollow
me at twitter dot com
my twitter is @atAmpersatKritz

always looking for "new oppotunities"
if you can pay me
to be alive and make cool games.

QUESTION: WILL YOU PUT THE CODE ONLINE?


um maybe. There's a lot of stuff in it I will need to rip out
like online authentication stuff
and stuff that I don't hold copyright over.

I give full permission and zero responsibility to people
what want to make CBD-inspired games.
I think it's cool.

just don't be weenies about it.


QUESTION: How can I play the game though??
answer: i dunno. the game was compiled to unity webplayer which
every browser in the world doesn't let you run
because it was very insecure
.
One day I might put an old build online
that doesn't have the login auth.
Don't hold me to that, i also said i would
make a video game for y'all
and i did noooot.

QUESTION: can you delete my account
yea im gonna nuke the accounts db at some point
all your passwords n stuff are encrypted + salted + hashed + etc. i couldnt get to them if i wanted to.
also i dont remember my password to the database lol.


I made this entire website (except the forums) myself.
i made the login and the auth and the security and everything by hand.

do not ever do this if you think it is a good idea,
i was young and stupid
and the only thing that's changed is
i am less young now.

If anyone from the media wants to get something a bit better written than this awful web site post feel free to message me, y'all know how.

thanks to mark serrels for doing that kotaku article ages ago, that was fun!
thanks to gaz for introducing me to a buncha aus devs back at pax in 2014
thanks to ivan for taking a chance on me and kickstarting my game dev career
thanks to "you" the player for being cool and
hoping against hope that i would make a video game
for you. i hope you have good memores.

thanks to the "pal bag" for being my friends on-line
thanks to me "nicholas" for writing this blog post

thanks to dril for making every word i type into the internet absolute dog s*it.

thanks to 'my wife' for buying me nice clothes

thanks to "the danger" (u know who u r) for eating eggs with me,
god i love them eggs
cant wait to eat eggs more
once we can go outside again.


QUESTION: is CBD dead?
nah lol its coming out next year!!!! get hyped!!
its epic exclusive
yo epic hit me up give me a hundred thousand
united states dollars
and i will give you this
video game, i will make it,
thats what it will cost
one hundred thousand
unityed states
dollars.

every year that it takes me to make it

epic games

yo hit me up cliffy b!!
uhhh no not that guy actually um

hit me up randy!!!

aw heck

uh

devlopver digital!! hit me up! adault swim? i love
rick and morty
itll be just like that
one hundred thousand dollars
every year
rick and morty
citizen burger disorder crossover

thats what it takes

and someone to help me do network code
i hate networking code
all of my homies hate netwokring code

also it will be made in unity i dont know how to do unreal engine

one hundred thousand dollars


alright friends email those people and you get your game its back on we're doing this We're Making Vitizen Burger Disorder!!!!



Citizen Burger Disoder 2: The First One: One Hundred Thousand Dollars: Per year: someone help me with networking
thats it thats the title



also rick and moty isnt that good half of the episodes are trash
dont harrass people about mac donald sauces
dont be a weird person





Thanks everyone! Be safe! Wear a mask!
Kind Regards,
Kritz

























































































































































































































































be awesome 2 the people u love <3